How I balance my career and marriage – Ufuoma Ejenobor

She was a model before Nollywood beckoned. But in recent times, not much was heard about her. The Entertainer went in search of Ufuoma Ejenobor only to discover that she’s still very much around and working. In this exclusive interview, the mother of one fielded all questions but left just one hanging. Excerpts:
You have not been in movies lately, was it as a result of marriage?
Oh no, that’s not true. I have been in the movies. I just shot one last month. I am not a producer, I am just an actor.
What are the changes in your life after you got married?
Nothing has changed.
What are you currently working on?
There is a script I suppose to work on now but they are not ready to produce yet. They are not ready to start production. So, as soon as they are ready, I will be on set.
How do you balance the home front with acting?
Marriage is a complexity. The same way you compartmentalize everything in your life is the same way you compartmentalize your marriage. You don’t make it a big deal. How do you handle having a brother, a sister, a mother, and a father? How you handle it? It is the way it presents itself to you, there’s no big deal about it. It’s the same way a woman who sells tomatoes balances her trade with taking care of the children. It’s the same way the banker balances her family and her job. There is nothing spectacular about it at all.
Your growing up, what was it like?
It was fantastic. I’ve got a large family so I always have people around me. Growing up was fun for me. I never had the dream of becoming an actress. It just happened to me. I didn’t dream of it. I am not one of those people who have been acting from their mother`s womb. I am not.
Do you have any plan of becoming a producer?
I would never say never. I’m producing a TV magazine programme right now. It’s a medical programme where people talk. I just came into motherhood recently and there have been so many experiences on the ground, which I think that if I had heard from mothers maybe I would have learnt one or two things. So, I am putting that together. You know, a platform where mothers can come together and share their experiences and let new mothers or intending mothers understand certain things about motherhood. But I would never say never, the field is big, the sky is large, there are stories to be told and God willing if it’s His plan for me to produce a film, I will definitely do so.
What is your opinion on violence against women, do you have any experience of this?
Whether we like it or not, it does happen and its high time we started speaking about it. It is high time we started training our children that violence against women is bad. I have a son, for example, I know that it will take the grace of God for me to impact it into him that you shouldn’t hit a woman. That we must learn to respect each other as human beings.
Have you been sexually harassed?
Sometimes people mistake sexual harassment for regular advances. Boy meets girl, boy likes girl and boy asks her out. Is that sexual harassment? I don’t know if you understand what I’m trying to say. The fact that you see me on the road and you walk up to me and say ‘hi, what’s your name?’ And I say Ufuoma. And then you say ‘Ufuoma, I like you, can we have a drink?’ That’s not sexual harassment. When it becomes sexual harassment is when you are in a position to overpower me and use those powers to intimidate me and ask for sex in return. In the same vein, I tell people that so long as it is not rape, walk away from it. There’s a certain way that I carry myself and I say this with all humility that even if you have the mind to sexually harass me, you would not even try it. So, I haven’t really had an experience when somebody in a position or in power uses such power to demand sex from me.
What really makes one a good actor?
What makes you a good actor is your ability to interpret a role and make it believable. Your ability to be that village girl and make people believe it. Your ability to bring the educated lawyer or banker to life and make people say ‘wow, you actually look like someone who works in a bank’. Your ability to bring any character to life. That’s my opinion of what makes you a good actor.
Fans would like to know why Ufuoma has knacks for crying when she is acting?
First of all the only reason why you cry is because the script says so or your director says so. A friend of mine told me that her mum died in her arms and she kept looking at her and tears refused to come. So, it’s not true that everything that happens to you, you put your hand on your head and cry. But acting depends on the roles you play.
Are you really an emotional person?
Yes. I am an emotional person but that has nothing to do with acting. You give your director what he wants. If he is not satisfied, you will do it until he is satisfied, and if he is stil not satisfied he will look for someone that will give him what he wants. So, being emotional has nothing to do with you as an actor.
Do you still model these days?
No, I don’t. I have stopped modelling a long time ago.
Why did you stop?
For me, modelling wasn’t a career choice. Modelling was something I was doing on the side before I got into school. While I was in the university, I was modelling. You know, just augmenting my pocket money from what my parents gave me to. Modeling is not something I would have opted for as a career because it cannot sustain me financially. So, I just did it for a while, and the minute I got involved in acting, everything else takes my time.
What lessons did you learn in modelling?
I think basically it launched me into entertainment. It helped build my skills and my ability to mingle. It gave me the ability to interact, mix with people, and meet different people. I actually went to a modeling school so I didn’t just learn to cat walk, I also learnt to present things.But it was fun while it lasted really.
Did you have challenging times that you wanted to quit?
Funny enough, it happened in acting not in modeling. There would always be those people who have low self-esteem and in order to put up their self-esteem, they want to bring you down. Trust me, it will never go away, no matter where you are in life, you will come across such people. I have been able to overcome them because I am not easily put down. I am this very strong, confident girl and there’s nothing I put my mind on that I don’t achieve.
What were the most embarrassing moments you had?
I won`t say any of those moments are embarrassing because they have been funny to me. I was with two colleagues of mine recently and they were describing only themselves as stars. It was my colleagues’ way of putting me down, telling me that ‘Ufuoma, you are not a star’. I don’t even consider myself as a star. Stardom is something that happens. What these colleagues of mine do not understand is that stardom is not associated with one sector, that’s one thing. I can be a truck pusher and still be a star. All I ever want to do is to make movies, all I ever want to be is to be the best actor that I can be.
Would anything make you give up acting even if your husband demands so?
Yeah. Never say never, I don’t know.
What do you miss being a star?
I used to buy corn on the road but I don’t buy corn on the road anymore, But the basic thing is that people tend to forget that you are human.
Is there a part of you that you would want to erase?
None. Christian none. Everything that I am today is a combination of my past, my present, and my future. If I erase anything from my past, Ufuoma is gone. If I erase any of my mistakes it means I am no more Ufuoma, I am somebody else.
Why did you marry a Whiteman?
Don’t let us talk about my marriage, its something that happened in 2010. Let’s just talk about my career.
Is your husband talking about relocating you to America?
No. Not at all. We have two homes, we have one here in Nigeria and the other one in the UK. But for now, we are here.