Author
of ‘Practical Steps to Financial Freedom and Independence,’ Usiere Uko,
writes about how paying yourself first helps to create the future you
desire
In Part 2 of the article, ‘Paying
yourself first,’ I adapted the title from the Yoruba saying – “ma se fi
owo mewewa jeun,” which in English means “don’t eat with all your ten
fingers.” When it comes to proverbs, I give it to the South-West. I am
almost ashamed to say that the literal meaning just dawned on me not so
long ago, in terms of how we really engage our hands and fingers in the
business of eating. Of course I knew what the saying was trying to pass
across and its practical application with respect to personal finance.
I was brainstorming alone that day when
the saying just dropped on my mind. For the first time, I stopped to
ponder deeper, and it dawned on me that we actually use one hand (five
fingers) while eating, not two. I visualised the process and realised it
will be very awkward to attempt to eat with both hands. I actually took
my two hands to the mouth. It was hilarious.
If you take your wife or partner out for
lunch in a restaurant, order for ‘eba’ and ‘efo riro’ and water to wash
your hands, and start digging in with both hands, your partner would be
so embarrassed that she will feel like hiding under the table. Adults
don’t do that. Not even children. Only toddles do that.
I then wondered why we do that with
money, especially when we are virtually living from month end to month
end. Some people take it to a whole new level. All the ten fingers are
not enough. They add the feet also.
Withstanding peer pressure
In a consumption driven society as ours,
delaying gratification is not easy. When your neighbour comes home with a
Range Rover, there is a subtle pressure on you to upgrade. If you don’t
know where you are going, you start to feel inferior and wish you could
also get one too. You start to feel under pressure to catch up.
Sometimes this pressure comes directly on you. Your peers start to make
fun of you, badmouth your car and advise you stop disgracing them and
upgrade. You may pretend it does not bother you but deep down it does.
You feel under pressure to ‘belong.’ It is very easy to fall into this
trap if you have no financial goals. I know a guy who drove a
weather-beaten Peugeot 504 for years despite peer pressure. I had a huge
respect for him, being able to withstand peer pressure for so long.
Then suddenly, he caved in. He started changing cars like lady’s
handbag. He started coming to work with different cars.
You should not allow anyone to put
pressure on you into doing what you are not ready to do. Being true to
yourself is a hallmark of maturity. Peer pressure can derail you and
drive you into the bush. The interesting thing is that if you lose your
job with a garage full of cars, none of your peers will help you out for
being such a good sport. Everyone will find their way, and if you are
left behind, you may find yourself on your own.
A time and season for everything
There is a time and season for everything
– a time to save and a time to spend. If you spend when you ought to
save, financial storms will expose how weak your financial foundation
really is.
Paying yourself first does not mean
swearing to an oath of poverty. It simply helps you to build your income
infrastructure in such a way that your income keeps going up without
you having to labour or beg your boss for a pay rise.
As your passive income goes up, you are
better able to afford those luxuries you really love. You can upgrade to
business or first class, stay where you want whenever you travel rather
than put up with friends and relatives with the interesting dynamics it
throws up; drive the car you want rather than managing. You get to live
the life you choose.
However, this is the prize. There is a
price to pay. Nothing good comes easy. Independence does not come on a
platter of gold. You have to fight for it. You have to create new
habits that will move you away from lack to abundance.
The main focus of paying yourself first
is to build a solid financial foundation to live the lifestyle you
desire. Hence, you do not have to labour to be able to afford the nice
things of life. You pay yourself first and invest wisely to help make
this happen. Having enough or living in abundance enhances your
enjoyment of life. Most marital squabbles have money at the root. The
love of money is the root of all evil, and the lack of money is the root
of bitterness.
Love yourself
We think we love ourselves but we are our
own worst enemies. We work long and hard, but when the money comes into
our hands, we give it all away. Our way of taking care of ourselves is
SPENDING money on ourselves.
We give the money away. We feel good
while the other party laughs all the way to the bank. When we are weak
financially, we cannot help others. And when we help, we give fish
rather than teach the recipient how to fish.
Hence, our help simply makes matters worse because we are creating dependency.
During aircraft safety briefings, you are
told than when cabin pressure drops, oxygen masks will drop
automatically. You are to fix yours first so that you can help others.
You cannot give what you don’t have. You will put both lives at risk.
You deserve a portion of your salary. You
are the one that worked for it. Why give it all away? Why pay yourself
last, if at all? When you fail to develop passive income streams, how
strong will you remain if something unexpected happens?
How you handle money determines whether
you will remain a slave to money or become the master of it. When you
eat with all your 10 fingers, you become a slave to money.
You tolerate all sorts of indignities
because you need the money. When you eat with five fingers and save the
rest to build assets, you can create the future you really desire rather
than only hoping and praying. You can do what you really want to do in
future because you have built the capacity to do so.
At the end of the day, paying yourself is
not about making your life miserable today. It is about delaying
gratification today so that you can enjoy to the fullest tomorrow.
Paying yourself first is
not giving your life away; it is about buying back your freedom. Without
freedom, you cannot truly be who you desire to be.
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