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Sunday 22 December 2013

5 Conversations You must have Before You Get Married

images (22)Dear to-be couples, you might be busy with all your wedding preparations, making list of things to arrange for, going on shopping sprees and deciding on honeymoon destinations. Surely the dreams of the future life with your beloved would be making your heart throb with excitement. But, in the midst of all the wedding mayhem you might overlook one of the most important things- your relationship. Marriages are made in heaven but they have not been decreed to be perfect and before you plunge on to take the wedding vows, here are certain things you need to discuss to ensure a stronger marriage.
1. Money
How to manage finances is the most important thing, especially for the two people who share a single roof and enter into a lifetime commitment. Differences in money management between spouses often become reasons for fights. For instance, if one of you likes to splurge while the other one wants to save for the rainy day, this can be a problem later on. Discuss about an approximate budget, the expenses likely to be incurred, whether you prefer having joint accounts or would like separate bank accounts. As marriage counselor Dr. Paul Sago says, “It is always better to have everything joint or “ours” in marriage rather than being selfish and thinking about one’s own self.”
2. In-Laws
Another pre-wedding topic about which couples should clear matters is the way to deal with in-laws. This is especially true if the in-laws might be too interfering at times. It is important to know, whether your partner is ready to bear the encumbrance of his future family on his shoulders without depending on his parents and the likes. Also, talk about your preference like whether you want to live in a nuclear family or a joint one after marriage.
3. Children
Children are truly gifts of God but that does not mean everyone would wish to have children just immediately after marriage. Therefore, broaching the topic in front of your partner and clearing out issues as to when he or she wants to have kids is essential. Talk on how many kids you both plan to have and when? This is the important conversation to have with your partner before committing.
4. s*x
s*x forms an integral and beautiful part of a married life and talking about it is one of the most essential things to do before you walk down the aisle. Have a tete-a-tete as to what exactly s*xual intimacy means to your would-be spouse. Clearing these things out beforehand will be beneficial for your relationship in the long run
5. Faith and Religion
Finally, whether you are of the same religion or from different spiritual backgrounds, discussing about matters of religion is essential. Talk about your individual faiths and beliefs, ways of worship, compliance to raising children according to specific religious beliefs and many other important topics before you take the plunge.
Even perfect couples tend to bicker due to lack of communication. Marriage is the union of two souls so make it last a lifetime. So, have these conversations with your would-be before you take this big plunge.
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