Although
Mary Awhotu Iyasere grew up in a polygamous setting, she was able to
pick up all the positive values needed to build a successful and
fulfilling live. From her shrewd father, she learned to be a prudent
businesswoman though she cut her teeth while living with an elder sister
who was a big time trader. Today, the woman of many
parts—philanthropist, politician, lawyer, community leader and
businesswoman— could not have wished for a better life. She told
ALEMMA-OZIORUVA ALIU recently that women should not clamour for any
position without working hard for it just like their male counterparts.
MARY practically grew up in the farm. Her father, a farmer with many wives ensured that all hands, whether young or old, were on deck to supply the needs of his large family. So, Mary, alongside her siblings farmed, fetched water and firewood, processed garri and did other necessary chores assigned them. All this notwithstanding, they still had to focus on their education and not lack in that regard.
While in the secondary school, she got a bit of respite from this tough routine when she left the village of her birth in Okitipupa, Ondo State to live with an elder sister in Warri. Unknown to her, however, she was already being prepared for her future career. “I got into the business of trading because my elder sister was a big trader and staying with her means I had to be involved in the business. Being a big trader in Warri Market, I used to go there to sell for her and do other household chores; so my interest in business actually started from there,” she says.
All the while, Mary nurtured a childhood dream of someday becoming a lawyer although this was not to be realised immediately, as she met and married her husband. But becoming a mother did not deter her from pursuing her dream. She sat for the Joint Admission and Matriculation Board (JAMB) examination and was admitted to read English and Literature at the University of Benin, which was not offering a course in law then. Because of her little children, Mary decided to settle for what Uniben had to offer although with the intention of reading law later when it would have been more convenient. “Education is something that is staggered. You start as a child and end it as an adult. I got my first degree in 1982, did my Masters in 1987, LLB in 2006 and BL in 2007,” she says.
After obtaining her second degree, she decided to go into business. “My family business started in a very small way. I was working at the Benin Owena River Basin and there wasn’t really enough work to do. So, I resigned to start out food processing business. My husband was still in paid employment then. We got a loan from NBCI and to also train our staff for two months. I opted to be trained so as to train the staff later because I felt that that way; I will always be in control of the production.
“I travelled to Belgium Luxemburg and other places to learn the art of continental food processing. My husband left paid employment when we were fairly stable to join the business and by the grace of the Lord, we provide the best and delicious safe to eat bread in Nigeria with the trade name of RIMA.”
Although she was married and had children, she felt her faculties were being under-utilised and needed to do more. This prompted her into becoming a politician.
But why politics of all things? “I see politics as a means of doing things right, helping people and touching lives. At a point I was the PDP woman leader in Delta State and I did the little I could to impact on people’s lives within what the party instructed. I stuck to the constitution of the party and even when election was conducted during my tenure as woman leader, I wasn’t tribalistic about anything other than to look at what the constitution gave me as role.
“To me, politics is a means of helping people and making sure that they are happy but when it becomes a do or die affair, count me out. Politics should be seen as a means of making life better for the people. It shouldn’t be for killing or making life miserable for others,” she says.
So, what is her view on Nigerian politicians generally? “We have very good politicians just like there are also the bad ones. It is just that people don’t take time to see what the former are doing. There are many good politicians who utilise whatever resources put in their care to cater for the people that such monies are meant for. They do things justly and objectively without introducing nepotism. Nigerians should just take time to look properly; these good politicians are all over the places.
“But you see, Nigerians are not patient; they are always out to condemn politicians believing all of them are bad. They think all politicians are thieves and call them all sorts of names but ask many Nigerians what they would do if given the same opportunity and you will be shocked at what they will say.
“Their first interest will be to develop themselves, their villages and others but that is not how it should be. When you hold an office and you have the opportunity to develop anywhere, you do so regardless of where the area is. Nigerians are too critical of politicians; they don’t even give them time to settle down, they don’t give them the opportunity to do what they want to do and you know the worst of it all, praise singing, which spoils politicians.
“Somebody is given a job and is doing it and people begin to praise and say all sorts of things even telling lies. What the person has not done, s/he is credited with it just because they want something from him/her.
“I think Nigerians should stop unnecessary praise singing and let politicians do their work according to their conscience instead of praising them for what they have not done.”
She also discovered she could even do more for the society by giving of what she has been blessed with either materially or otherwise to the underprivileged. Her philanthropic nature was thus unearthed. ““I feel very happy when I wake up everyday knowing I’m making a difference in somebody’s life. Whatever an individual has is not really his because the day you close your eyes, you don’t even know what will happen to all you have acquired when you are gone. So why not use it to help others? A life can only be considered great on account of how many lives have been impacted positively and helped to achieve success.
“I help people a lot and they don’t have to come from my territory, village or environment. I am a St Vincent De Paul whose work is to help the poor and I am also a member of Project Charilove in Benin City. They take care of poor people and vulnerable children.
“I have a group I started with some women, called Women Solidarity Movement. It is purely for the empowerment of women— rural women, vulnerable children and poor people even in the city because women and children are more vulnerable. Something as little as buying a handset, giving them tables and chairs to run call centres goes a long way to put food on the their families’ tables.
“Personally for me, I sleep well everyday when I have been able to make somebody’s life better.”
If there is anyone, Mary is grateful to for enabling her perform her many roles even as she succeeds on the home front, it is her husband who she says has always been there, giving her all the necessary support and encouragement she needs. “My husband is a wonderful man; he gives me leverage to go into politics and do whatever I want but my house does not suffer on that account. I started business at the back of my house then because my children were young. Now the business has grown and I am also into politics. I do my business freely because the children have also grown.
“My last child is a lawyer with four children. All my children are married so it’s just me and my husband and other people’s children that we are helping to train. I run my home perfectly and my husband supports me. He is also into philanthropy, we do our business together and we work together and run our home together,” she says with a smile.
Another role model she admired while growing up was her father who inculcated many values and virtues into his children. ““My father was a shrewd businessman, a very good one at that. He knew how to make money and how to trade. My father would buy oil from farmers during the time of plenty and store it everywhere in our compound. During the lean season, he would put it in jerry cans or tins and take to Lagos for sale. He used to say that you have to work hard while young so that when you are old, you will enjoy the proceeds of the work you have done.
“He taught us humility and honesty. He taught us to be good to the people we meet and that was his life. He never liked oppression and that is the way all his children are.
“But now, my husband has become my role model because he is a man worthy of emulation. He is generous, kind and liberal just like the Lord gave us free will to live our lives. A person can choose to be good or bad. My husband gives me the free will to choose whatever I want to do but with moderation,” she says.
Coming from a polygamous background but having a monogamous family, how would she compare the two? “There is a world of difference. In my father’s time, women fed him, he didn’t need to give the women money to cook for him or do anything. Actually the women helped him in his farm work and they took turns to cook for him but you see modern life is different. If a modern man decides to marry many wives, he is going to get into trouble because times have changed. A man needs to take care of his children, feeds his wives irrespective of whether they are working or not.
“There are responsibilities assigned to a man and even if the wife is working and earning more salary than the husband, he must be able to provide something for the home. So, if a man marries many wives today, he will find that each keeps to herself and he is going to be in trouble.
“Again, school fees have gone up and cost of living is also high. So, monogamy is a better choice because it keeps a husband and wife closer to each other and they can plan together. When a man has many wives, he is really nobody’s business. The women can pretend but actually he is nobody’s business,” she says.
A word for fellow women: “Women should never claim anything just because of who they are. If a man can struggle to be whatever he wants to be, a woman should also do the same to achieve desired goals. I don’t support the idea of a woman being given something without earning it.
“Everybody should work out what they want to be in life and the fact that one is a woman does not make her a lesser human being. The Lord created women to support men but He did not say that because of this she is an inferior human being. I am always not happy when women claim things that they don’t merit.
“Both the women and men should work hard and let everybody get posts and other things based on hard work and not because of their sex.
“The university is open; men and women go there. Business is also open. If anyone goes to the bank and present his/her credentials, they will be given loan. I started my business with a loan from the bank, which I paid back.”
When not running around ensuring all her various businesses are functioning optimally, Mary loves traveling and going on holidays together with her husband. She also loves watching movies.
She hails from Orhoakpor, Ethiope East local government council in Delta State.
MARY practically grew up in the farm. Her father, a farmer with many wives ensured that all hands, whether young or old, were on deck to supply the needs of his large family. So, Mary, alongside her siblings farmed, fetched water and firewood, processed garri and did other necessary chores assigned them. All this notwithstanding, they still had to focus on their education and not lack in that regard.
While in the secondary school, she got a bit of respite from this tough routine when she left the village of her birth in Okitipupa, Ondo State to live with an elder sister in Warri. Unknown to her, however, she was already being prepared for her future career. “I got into the business of trading because my elder sister was a big trader and staying with her means I had to be involved in the business. Being a big trader in Warri Market, I used to go there to sell for her and do other household chores; so my interest in business actually started from there,” she says.
All the while, Mary nurtured a childhood dream of someday becoming a lawyer although this was not to be realised immediately, as she met and married her husband. But becoming a mother did not deter her from pursuing her dream. She sat for the Joint Admission and Matriculation Board (JAMB) examination and was admitted to read English and Literature at the University of Benin, which was not offering a course in law then. Because of her little children, Mary decided to settle for what Uniben had to offer although with the intention of reading law later when it would have been more convenient. “Education is something that is staggered. You start as a child and end it as an adult. I got my first degree in 1982, did my Masters in 1987, LLB in 2006 and BL in 2007,” she says.
After obtaining her second degree, she decided to go into business. “My family business started in a very small way. I was working at the Benin Owena River Basin and there wasn’t really enough work to do. So, I resigned to start out food processing business. My husband was still in paid employment then. We got a loan from NBCI and to also train our staff for two months. I opted to be trained so as to train the staff later because I felt that that way; I will always be in control of the production.
“I travelled to Belgium Luxemburg and other places to learn the art of continental food processing. My husband left paid employment when we were fairly stable to join the business and by the grace of the Lord, we provide the best and delicious safe to eat bread in Nigeria with the trade name of RIMA.”
Although she was married and had children, she felt her faculties were being under-utilised and needed to do more. This prompted her into becoming a politician.
But why politics of all things? “I see politics as a means of doing things right, helping people and touching lives. At a point I was the PDP woman leader in Delta State and I did the little I could to impact on people’s lives within what the party instructed. I stuck to the constitution of the party and even when election was conducted during my tenure as woman leader, I wasn’t tribalistic about anything other than to look at what the constitution gave me as role.
“To me, politics is a means of helping people and making sure that they are happy but when it becomes a do or die affair, count me out. Politics should be seen as a means of making life better for the people. It shouldn’t be for killing or making life miserable for others,” she says.
So, what is her view on Nigerian politicians generally? “We have very good politicians just like there are also the bad ones. It is just that people don’t take time to see what the former are doing. There are many good politicians who utilise whatever resources put in their care to cater for the people that such monies are meant for. They do things justly and objectively without introducing nepotism. Nigerians should just take time to look properly; these good politicians are all over the places.
“But you see, Nigerians are not patient; they are always out to condemn politicians believing all of them are bad. They think all politicians are thieves and call them all sorts of names but ask many Nigerians what they would do if given the same opportunity and you will be shocked at what they will say.
“Their first interest will be to develop themselves, their villages and others but that is not how it should be. When you hold an office and you have the opportunity to develop anywhere, you do so regardless of where the area is. Nigerians are too critical of politicians; they don’t even give them time to settle down, they don’t give them the opportunity to do what they want to do and you know the worst of it all, praise singing, which spoils politicians.
“Somebody is given a job and is doing it and people begin to praise and say all sorts of things even telling lies. What the person has not done, s/he is credited with it just because they want something from him/her.
“I think Nigerians should stop unnecessary praise singing and let politicians do their work according to their conscience instead of praising them for what they have not done.”
She also discovered she could even do more for the society by giving of what she has been blessed with either materially or otherwise to the underprivileged. Her philanthropic nature was thus unearthed. ““I feel very happy when I wake up everyday knowing I’m making a difference in somebody’s life. Whatever an individual has is not really his because the day you close your eyes, you don’t even know what will happen to all you have acquired when you are gone. So why not use it to help others? A life can only be considered great on account of how many lives have been impacted positively and helped to achieve success.
“I help people a lot and they don’t have to come from my territory, village or environment. I am a St Vincent De Paul whose work is to help the poor and I am also a member of Project Charilove in Benin City. They take care of poor people and vulnerable children.
“I have a group I started with some women, called Women Solidarity Movement. It is purely for the empowerment of women— rural women, vulnerable children and poor people even in the city because women and children are more vulnerable. Something as little as buying a handset, giving them tables and chairs to run call centres goes a long way to put food on the their families’ tables.
“Personally for me, I sleep well everyday when I have been able to make somebody’s life better.”
If there is anyone, Mary is grateful to for enabling her perform her many roles even as she succeeds on the home front, it is her husband who she says has always been there, giving her all the necessary support and encouragement she needs. “My husband is a wonderful man; he gives me leverage to go into politics and do whatever I want but my house does not suffer on that account. I started business at the back of my house then because my children were young. Now the business has grown and I am also into politics. I do my business freely because the children have also grown.
“My last child is a lawyer with four children. All my children are married so it’s just me and my husband and other people’s children that we are helping to train. I run my home perfectly and my husband supports me. He is also into philanthropy, we do our business together and we work together and run our home together,” she says with a smile.
Another role model she admired while growing up was her father who inculcated many values and virtues into his children. ““My father was a shrewd businessman, a very good one at that. He knew how to make money and how to trade. My father would buy oil from farmers during the time of plenty and store it everywhere in our compound. During the lean season, he would put it in jerry cans or tins and take to Lagos for sale. He used to say that you have to work hard while young so that when you are old, you will enjoy the proceeds of the work you have done.
“He taught us humility and honesty. He taught us to be good to the people we meet and that was his life. He never liked oppression and that is the way all his children are.
“But now, my husband has become my role model because he is a man worthy of emulation. He is generous, kind and liberal just like the Lord gave us free will to live our lives. A person can choose to be good or bad. My husband gives me the free will to choose whatever I want to do but with moderation,” she says.
Coming from a polygamous background but having a monogamous family, how would she compare the two? “There is a world of difference. In my father’s time, women fed him, he didn’t need to give the women money to cook for him or do anything. Actually the women helped him in his farm work and they took turns to cook for him but you see modern life is different. If a modern man decides to marry many wives, he is going to get into trouble because times have changed. A man needs to take care of his children, feeds his wives irrespective of whether they are working or not.
“There are responsibilities assigned to a man and even if the wife is working and earning more salary than the husband, he must be able to provide something for the home. So, if a man marries many wives today, he will find that each keeps to herself and he is going to be in trouble.
“Again, school fees have gone up and cost of living is also high. So, monogamy is a better choice because it keeps a husband and wife closer to each other and they can plan together. When a man has many wives, he is really nobody’s business. The women can pretend but actually he is nobody’s business,” she says.
A word for fellow women: “Women should never claim anything just because of who they are. If a man can struggle to be whatever he wants to be, a woman should also do the same to achieve desired goals. I don’t support the idea of a woman being given something without earning it.
“Everybody should work out what they want to be in life and the fact that one is a woman does not make her a lesser human being. The Lord created women to support men but He did not say that because of this she is an inferior human being. I am always not happy when women claim things that they don’t merit.
“Both the women and men should work hard and let everybody get posts and other things based on hard work and not because of their sex.
“The university is open; men and women go there. Business is also open. If anyone goes to the bank and present his/her credentials, they will be given loan. I started my business with a loan from the bank, which I paid back.”
When not running around ensuring all her various businesses are functioning optimally, Mary loves traveling and going on holidays together with her husband. She also loves watching movies.
She hails from Orhoakpor, Ethiope East local government council in Delta State.
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