JUNE 20, 2015 : TUNDE AJAJA
Don’t tell anyone I told you this, and remember it’s just between you and me. If anyone finds out, you are on your own,’ such is usually the intro or the concluding part of a gossip.
Men call it ‘mere discussion’ while women call it ‘gist’, but regardless of the colouration people try to give it, it is called gossip, defined simply as an idle talk between two or more persons, and usually about the affairs of others. It can also be defined as a casual conversation about other people, typically involving their private lives and usually sweet to the hearing.
Women used to be seen as gossiping and spreading rumours but experts say men seem to be better gossip.
According to a study conducted by a global research company, Onepoll, men are not just the bigger gossips, they spend more time gossiping than women. The story says men are more likely to expose the dirt about other people than women.
The study conducted by a global research company, Onepoll, found that men are happier when gossiping with their colleagues and that their contribution to the ‘chat’ gives them a feel of belonging. The findings of the study were published on Telegraph Online.
In the course of the study in which 5,000 people participated, it was found that men spend an average of 76 minutes gossiping with their friends while women spend just 52 minutes.
The study also found that while men prefer to exchange gossip in the office, mostly with their colleagues at work, women prefer to ‘confide in their friends’ while at home.
Male participants in the study pointed out that topics that usually dominate their ‘discussion’ with their male colleagues or friends include women, female colleagues at work, especially the most attractive ones, salaries and their sexual relationships, while the female participants said they were usually interested in other women, family issues, in-laws and celebrities.
While one third of the male participants said they were usually in their happiest mood when gossiping with their colleagues, 58 per cent said gossiping gave them a sense of belonging while 31 per cent of the men said they preferred chatting with their partners to having sexual relationship.
A spokesperson for the company said, “It is commonly believed that women are the ones who love to spread rumours and gossip about their friends behind their backs, but this poll proves that men aren’t as bad as women, they are worse!
“We found that men will do anything they can to be the centre of attention with their colleagues and peers. At the end of the day, hot gossip spices up what would otherwise be another boring day at the office for them.
“Women also love to talk about news, but rather than focusing on politics or government issues, news about soap operas, family issues, celebrities and other women are more likely to cause a debate and keep them busy.
“And for women, any type of relationship is up for discussion, whether it is their own, their friends, their friends’ friends or their bond with their mother-in-law, while topics dear to men include the local news agenda, rumours about possible relationships in the office or the boss, promotions, sex and salaries.”
The study further pointed out that more than half of women discuss details about their private lives with their friends while men’s discussion is usually dominated by happenings at work and their sexual relationship or escapades.
“Although they discuss very different things during their gossiping sessions, men and women agree on one thing – talking with more mates, work colleagues or partners makes them feel like they belong,” the study added.
Topics of interest to men, according to the study, include drunken friends, old school friends, female workmates, the sexiest girl at work, spreading rumours, promotions (who deserves it and who does not), sexual relationships and about the bosses and their activities and lifestyle.
On the other hand, topics of interest to women include other women, news, relationship problems, other people’s relationships, sexual relationships, friend’s weight gain, other women’s boyfriends and husbands, mothers-in-law and celebrities.
Also, a 2014 study published on nicolehart8.wordpress.com, shows that men spend 30 per cent more time gossiping than women and that they cannot keep a secret for more than three hours while women can still hold it for three hours and 40 minutes. The study also reveals that men have shorter attention span at work and that they have a greater tendency to take a break off work to have a quick chat.
Another study conducted in the United Kingdom by one of Britain’s longest established market research agencies, British Market Research Bureau Limited, found that men spread rumours than women, adding that 20 per cent of men spend up to three hours everyday to gossip, mainly about female colleagues.
The study, which surveyed 1,033 adults and published on Mail Online, added that 55 per cent of men gossip at work compared to 46 per cent of women who do same at work. Participants in the study also found that 17 per cent of married men are more interested in pillow talks than sex while women who have such preference are just 10 per cent.
The researchers concluded that people are fascinated by gossip, whether it is about work or love lives among others, noting that men are more likely to gossip for the most part of the day, dismissing the belief that women do it more.
Commenting on the study, a professor of psychology, Toba Elegbeleye, said both men and women gossip but that the subject of their conversation differs noting that the intensity of gossip by both men and women are the same.
He said, “In terms of gossiping, everybody does it, and it’s a way people flaunt their template of how they think people should live, more so that gossiping boosts people’s self esteem.
“Even though it has been found that every woman subscribes to gossiping, and that theirs does not need to have any preliminary motivation, men’s type of gossiping or discussion is of the same magnitude and intensity, just that the subject and texture of the conversation differ.
“The issues men and women gossip about are different but when you listen to men talk about the things that interest them and you listen to women talk about theirs, both are quite intense in terms of magnitude.”
Elegbeleye explained further that men tend to gossip more in the office than women because they have a higher level of aspiration and are more likely to be active union members, which would make them engage in grumbling gossip. “Women in the same office may likely gossip about their female counterparts, especially those close to senior executives, than the dynamics in the office,” he added.
source:PUNCH.
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