I was addicted to alcohol for 40 years of my life –Link R, 59

 AZUKA JEBOSE MOLOKWU 

   

 

 

 

Link R

Nearly 18m American adults between ages of 18 and above are alcoholics or recovering addicts. Twelve million of this number are men while the remaining six million are shared between women and underage drinkers. The land of freedom has a drinking problem; you are free to drink stupidly. One in every 12 adults suffers from alcoholism abuse. America identified its social problem as a disease and placed several programmes in place to treat and deal with the rising social epidemic among its populace. Anyone can become an alcoholic. Studies found that those with higher education are more likely to be alcoholics than the uneducated Americans. In the United States, a person is killed every 30 minutes in an alcohol related auto accident.

Approximately, 700,000 teenagers between 12 and 17 years of age have been treated at specialised facilities for alcohol use disorder since 2013. Alcoholism is the third leading preventable cause of death in United States, killing nearly 90,000 in 2013. Alcohol misuse cost over $223.5bn annually as Americans spend $197m each day on alcohol.

Over 200 diseases and injury related health issues have been associated with alcohol consumption. These diseases include liver cirrhosis, cancer, premature death and disability.

Despite the rise in the number of alcoholism, about 40 per cent of those with alcohol dependency fully recover from the disease. More than half of all adults have a family history of alcoholism, an addiction that can be treated.

Link R is a recovering alcoholic. He spent 40 years of his life addicted to alcohol, a journey he began at age 12. At 59, he reflected during a recent journey to Healing Place, a rehab, on his life as one of America’s recovering alcoholics, a disease he claimed came from his father’s gene. Link R had eleven siblings; five were alcoholics, including Mr. R. Two of his siblings, a brother and a sister, died from alcoholism.

“I began drinking at 12. I watched my father drink every weekend. We would always go to the liquor store to buy alcoholic beverages. It was my past time going to the liquor store in my neighborhood with dad and my friends. I also hung around the stores. These were early influences. I watched my father get drunk every day. He didn’t make me drink. I began to drink after watching him. My mother did her best to redirect me from where alcoholism was taking me then. I thought I was a grown man at that age, a hothead. I didn’t listen despite the discipline. I did what I wanted to do. I came from the old school. I got whipped, but the whipping then didn’t do me any good. I grew up around liquor store. On weekends, my friends, dad and I would go to the liquor store and buy drinks; then got drunk. Jebose, I have been an alcoholic for over 40 years. I didn’t know I was an alcoholic. I thought I liked to drink. However, after going into treatment, I realised I was an alcoholic. Alcoholism is a disease. It runs in my family. The disease killed my brother and sister; it is ravaging my family and other American families.

“We were 11 siblings; five of us are alcoholics or recovering addicts. In 1992, I went to prison, a second time, for DWI (Driving While Impaired). The first time was in 1988. I got two DWI the same night. Back then, if you were caught with DWI, you would be put in jail and after four hours, the law allowed you to go home. That night, the arresting officer told me not to get in my car. But I was stupid. I had a bottle of liquor in my car. The same police officer that arrested me few hours then watched me drive off after I got out of jail. Before I drove off, I opened the liquor inside my car and drank: the officer saw me, pulled me over and arrested me again. In 1992, I was sentenced to two years in prison. After my prison term, I continued with this dependency lifestyle. I lived life like my dad, worked hard, paid bills and once bills were paid; I took care of my weekends by getting drunk. It progressed from drinking on weekends to few week days, and then got worse every day. I knew I could stop the drinks. But I always said it was my weekend to get drunk. I would celebrate myself with alcohol. I grew from being a kind, wonderful loving person to an angry, arrogant, don’t-give-a-crap- about life- kind of person. If I didn’t drink, I would be like my other siblings that never drank. Jebose, the part of being an alcoholic comes from me because I could control it. I had to drink to be equal or better than other people around me. I had very low self-esteem problem then.”

Last June, Link R sought help for his addiction and alcoholism dependency. After weeks of roaming the streets seeking an organised structure that could provide him the professional rehabilitation, he found the Healing Place, a non-profit organisation that provides shelter and help for men and women who are addicted to alcohol and other drugs. One year into his treatment, he became a Peer Mentor to other alcoholics seeking a pathway to their new lifestyles.

“Jebose, I had spent sixty days in jail for assault on a female. I didn’t drink anything, my mind was right and I was thinking right. But the day I got out of jail, my old behaviour kicked in. Within an hour after I came out of jail, I went to the liquor store, bought drinks and resumed consumption. I had nowhere to go. I was in the street, drinking and smoking, few hours after being released from jail but by God’s grace, something hit me; I began to ask myself ‘why am I doing this to myself’? I decided to check into a rehabilitation centre. I knew I needed help. After three searches, I found the Healing Place. I don’t know how I did it, but I kept staying. My intention was to stay here for three days, but one year later, I am here, sober and mentoring others. I don’t regret the forty years of being an alcoholic because if I didn’t have those years, I wouldn’t be at peace with myself. I can’t change the past but I can change the future. Being an alcoholic is a disease. A lot of people came through this programme, worse than me but got help. We are sick. We are like any other person that has a disease. Take a person that has cancer, you don’t kick that person to the curves; you try to offer help because he can’t help himself. Alcoholism is the same illness as suffering from cancer. We know we are sick. But society misunderstands the disease and the afflicted. Society thinks we drink and we are bad people. We are not bad people. We are sick. We have disease just like a cancer patient. That’s why rehab centres teach us about the disease of alcoholism. I have the information to know about it and manage my new lifestyle. Relapse happens but I take it one day at a time.

“Being a recovering alcoholic and not knowing I was an alcoholic, for many years, screwed my life the past forty years. Yes. It affected my life. I regret the past but won’t dwell on it. I can’t change the past. If I go on a self-pity trip with the past, then it would put me back on a path where I was. I don’t want to go back. It’s not about the past today, it’s about moving forward. Something so simple took me 40 years to get. If I don’t put a drink in me, I won’t get drunk. We have a choice everyday, a choice to either use or not to use. I accepted the fact that I am a recovering alcoholic. I am not ashamed of saying I am a recovering alcoholic. Change is good. I was afraid of change. Old habits die hard. But once you get rid of those old habits and accept change, then you are moving forward. I have not had the urge for a drink in one year. You can ask God but if you don’t put actions in that, it won’t work for you. Faith without works is dead. My life is my will; my actions are my life. It took me forever to learn that we have choices. I like waking up in the morning knowing where I am. I don’t have to look over my shoulders. I am not going to go back to the life I was living.

“The sad part of being an alcoholic is that you don’t even know what you are doing to your body. You’ve got to have it because your body craves it. You can get drunk; sometimes I drank so much that I didn’t feel it. I went into a rehab with my blood alcohol content registering at 3.4 above limit. Yet I wasn’t drunk. I was a walking dead man. I didn’t feel drunk and I still didn’t have the sense that it was killing me. The rehab centre rushed me to the hospital.”

source;PUNCH.