How to save money after losing a job

OCTOBER 30, 2014 BY UGODRE OBI-CHUKWU 

   

 

 

Ugodre Obi-Chukwu

Ali earned a seven figure salary for years until he lost his job recently. His former employers hit financial trouble and had to downsize to ensure the company does not go down. To compensate Ali, the company paid him severance package that was equal to his one year annual salary. He reckons it might take him six months to one year to get a new job and does not want to run out of cash before then, let alone see his severance vanish. His options are limited to spending wisely and investing cautiously lest he faces the consequences of losing not just a job but his savings.

Remaining financially viable after losing a job and before getting another is not very easy. However, with determination and self believe one can achieve this. While there is no one size fits all approach to responding, I believe applying the following ideas can help prepare you or anyone you might know who is in this situation.

Change feeding habits

Having a job requires that you sometimes engage in excessive feeding habits that cost you money. You often dine out at expensive restaurants. Your house is also piled with groceries you actually need and those you also don’t need. Not having a job brings you back to reality and you realise you should only spend money on things you absolutely need. Start buying only basic food items. Eat more of the food you prepare at home and avoid dining out as much as you can. Reduce consumption of expensive wine and beverages.

Adjust transportation needs

Losing a job means you probably spend more time going out as you seek another job or source of income. However, this can be quite expensive considering the fuel and maintenance cost for those who have a car and cost of public transportation for those who don’t. Therefore, you must make sure every commute you make is essential and not frivolous. Go out if it is absolutely necessary. Some people have this erroneous believe that going out actually helps you meet people without realising that the chances of getting a job at a bar is as slim as lightening striking twice on the same spot.

Get health insurance

Most Nigerian jobs come with some form of health insurance or another, therefore losing the job means losing health insurance at some point. It is therefore essential that you take some of that severance and buy health insurance for you and your immediate family. That way everyone gets covered when they fall sick by getting medical care. You should also try to stay healthy and avoid doing things that may put your health in jeopardy.

Quit expensive bad habits

We all have bad habits that are difficult to contain however, when you find yourself in a critical situation it is important to just simply quit. Expensive habits such as but not limited to drinking, partying, fashion addiction etc, must be curtailed significantly if you are to stay afloat. Most people get depressed after losing their jobs because they either feel pained they can’t afford the niceties they were used to or end up spending their savings living a false life.

Stick to a budget

One of the key ingredients of frugal living is keeping a decent workable budget. It becomes even more important to stick to a budget when you are out of job. A well planned budget is a very good starting point and should reflect the current state of affairs. Remember, the income side of the budget will mostly be limited and not enough to fund the expenses leaving the budget with a deficit. The more conservative your budget, the slimmer the deficit you carry forward.

Don’t be afraid to accept money

Family and friends can offer financial or moral support at times like this and should be accepted with all appreciation. Some people view help and support as an insult and will reject it, however I do believe any help you can get is very vital to your ability to bounce back. Some can offer you indirect financial support and not direct cash.

Re-negotiate deals and rates

For those who lose their jobs and still have agreements such as loans, mortgages, rent etc. rather than default on mortgages and loans you can approach your lenders to renegotiate the terms ahead of the next installment payments. Write them officially and tell them of your present status and request for a restructuring of the debt to enable ease of payment. You can also inform your landlord of your current situation which inadvertently is telling him ahead of time not to increase the rent.

Register with a job site or service

This is perhaps the first thing you must do as the longer you stay out of work, the longer it takes to get another. One way to remain in the loop is registering with a job website that can give you regular updates on job openings that suit your career prospects and profession. The more interviews you attend the higher your chances of getting a new job and surely the more money you save down the line.

Do you know anyone in this situation? How have they faired? Send me an email ugodre@nairametrics.com or tweet at me @ugodre

source: Punch

How to be a Good Nigerian Wife...Is this true?

29.10.2014 at 9:49 am By Kome Olori Agulonu

Dear Nigerian wife, heartfelt congratulations to you on your recent nuptials. Love is indeed a beautiful thing and I am so pleased that you have met and married the man of your dreams. Surely after all the celebration, you just want to go home and live happily ever after with your other half. To help you navigate towards your future happiness, here are a few words of wisdom from me to you completely free of charge:

The first thing you must know about being a good wife is that your in-laws have all the power in your marriage. Regardless of all you thought or imagined in the past, you start to live by their grace as soon as you say “I do”. Yes. They can visit your home anytime they like with suitcases in tow and stay for as long as they like too. Simply delete any idea you have to complain – after all, you should be grateful they let their son or brother marry you. Instead, as a good wife, you should concern yourself with more important things like getting pregnant immediately. Do not get it twisted. These people are not interested in your ‘good’ girl reputation. All they really want are grand-children.  How you even managed to marry their son without a bun in the oven is beyond them. Didn’t Mary mother of Jesus experience Immaculate Conception? So why didn’t you?

Secondly- for as long as you intend to stay married to Mr wonderful, your cooking has to be on point. In this case, variety is your friend. You have to be able to impress him with your cooking if you want him to keep growing in love with you. Under no condition should you consider ordering food from outside your home; only lazy women get take-out for their families to eat. So please even if hubby requests for Banga soup and starch at midnight, you have to be willing to make it for him. Failure to deliver will push hubby into the hands of those girls out there.

Ha those girls out there! Haven’t you noticed them hanging around before? They are the hot, single ladies who go everywhere in Brazilian hair, short dresses and enough makeup to kill the fishes in the Atlantic Ocean. They are hard-core believers in the merits of married men and their main aim of living is your husband. They go everywhere hoping to bump into him so they can snatch him. But don’t be deceived oh. Even though they look like they live in the salon, these babes can cook! Think about any dish – pepper soup, banga soup, Ayematse, even Bolognese. It does not matter what country or continent the dish is from, they will deliver.

If the girls outside do not catch your husband first, trust the witches and wizards in both your villages to do it. Imagine both Yokozuna and the Undertaker catching your man in a tight corner, and then you know that he is finished. It does not matter that he has never been to his village before. All these forces need to know is that he got married and has to provide for his family to come after him with the vengeance of Amadioha (Igbo deity). To safe guard him and your happiness, you have to join the nearest praying church in your area preferably the ones that chase their enemies with fire. Thereafter, you have to pray every day and night or the witches will think that you are only joking. Ignore the fact that your husband sleeps through your night vigils. It is not him you are after. It is the witches and you don’t want them to intensify their mission. Or do you?

Before long, things should start to quiet down on the spiritual front since more people from your village will have gotten hitched. The shift will leave enough time for you to diligently do your husband’s laundry. Note -Dirty shirts and boxers are your new best friends. They allow you to prove your undying love for your husband. Luckily many people have washing machines nowadays so they rarely have to deal with the skid marks left on oga’s underwear. If for any reason you do not have one of those machines in your house Ariel detergent and a few scrubs works wonders. The magic is complete when everything is dry, neatly ironed and arranged in the drawers for the next wear. His colleagues, friends and family will see how impeccably dressed he is and praise you to high heavens.

Now, while you are pleasing the in-laws, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, working (because modern men detest idle women) you have to make it your objective to remain sexy. So that when the time for adult games come (the one that usually involves a bed) he has absolutely nothing to complain about. You must never plead tiredness, headaches or you will have to explain what you have been doing all day? Also, it is highly beneficial if you endeavour to stay fit because he may ask you to get into all sorts of kinky positions perhaps involving a pole. Whatever you do, do not give him a reason to return you to your father’s house like a broken Barbie. We all know that it does not end well for wives who are returned. Keep him happy.

Dear wife, you do not need to be Nigerian to benefit from the advice here. These words will help you even if you or your husband is from another part of Africa where a happy husband means a happy wife and home.

Finally, thank you, dear reader for reading this far. Allow me to point out that the words above do not reflect my opinion of marriage or how to be a good wife in any way. They are simply, extreme, stereotypical opinions (compiled with fun in mind) of marriage that have been passed on to many young ladies, including me as advise by well-meaning friends and family. To me, a good marriage is not at all about servitude, subjugation or any of their cousins.

I hope you enjoyed my compilation and look forward to any additional stereotypical ideas that you can add in the comment area.

Live, Love, Laugh.

Photo Credit: Dreamstime | Orangeline

Source: Bella naija 

Finding your hidden talents

October 29, 2014 | Filed under: This is Money | Author: Mike Michalowicz

Everyone has a talent.  Everyone.  So maybe yours is blowing milk out your nose… it’s still a talent.  And most talents can be monetized.  The key is to find your talent and then turn it into a scalable business.  Too bad many folks get stuck on the “finding the talent” part.  Here is a list of 55 ideas, all contributed by the TPE community, on how to find your hidden talent.  You have it!  Now find it:

Sorry, no excuses allowed: First, figure out what benefits you are getting by not finding your own talents. For example, are you really afraid to try something new because it might not work, so not letting your talents surface gives you an excuse for not succeeding – or do you just feel safer being able to blame your problems (boredom, lack of money) on someone or something else? Once you know what you are gaining by not seeking out your own talents, it is easier to let go of those old outdated beliefs about yourself and move on to new ideas.

Jar painting out of necessity: I discovered my hidden talent of painting jars in 1998 when I wanted something decorative to hold my 80 flavors of tea on my kitchen counter. I have now painted over 5000 glass jars (jelly jars, pickle jars, mayonnaise jars etc.) No two are alike and I’ve sold or given most of them away filled with candy, tea, paperclips, rolled-up dollar bills.

 Mirror, mirror on the all: Think about the things that you do naturally that others say “I wish I could do that.  as good as you do” and you say “whatever, no big deal, that’s nothing, etc., etc.”

 Others see it before you: One key to discovering a hidden talent is to remain open and receptive to new ideas – no matter how crazy they may seem. For more than a dozen years after entering the workplace employers and clients regularly told me that I would make a great teacher. I never took the idea seriously because I could never see myself being comfortable in a conventional classroom environment. In 1994 I discovered a subject I am passionate about – chocolate – and now I love teaching because it’s fun, not work.

Find your strengths: The best way to find your strengths or hidden talents is to take the online test of the book, “Now, Discover your strengths!” by Marcys Buckingham. This online test will show you your hidden talents.

Capitalize on Your Strengths: Read the book Strengths Finder 2.0 (by Tom Rath). Take the assessment and Pay Attention to the messages it either provides or that it affirms.

Go with your gut: Go with your gut. Whatever gives you the most personal satisfaction is more than likely your hidden talent.

Do what you love: The best way to discover a hidden talent is to think about what you love to do. What have you always wanted to try but haven’t yet? What do you see others doing that you wish you were doing? The best tip for discovering your hidden talent is simply to think about what you love to do!

Take an improv class: An Improv Class will encourage you to think across so many genres: different movies, countries, accents, periods of time. Then you must become what is needed for the scene: an alien, an 18th century aristocrat, a 60 year old truck driver, a 5 year old girl. Get your different voices out, walk with a certain gait, dance, sing. Transform yourself on stage, and you will discover more passions and hidden talents within!

Listen carefully: People will tell you everything about themselves if you listen carefully and do not interrupt them. For hiring, friendships or doing business with them always do some background checking (credit report for example will often tell you where they live and have lived for evaluating their resume or conversation).

 Follow Eleanor Roosevelt’s Suggestion: Do something that scares you every day.” Following this quote from Eleanor Roosevelt will help you find your hidden talent(s).

Try Everything: Try everything! Whatever your hidden talent is will shine through as you’ll be mediocre (or completely suck) at everything else. The trick is to quickly realize what you’re not good at.

Comfort zones stunt your growth: The best way to explore hidden talents is to try completely new “scary” things for yourself. Skydive, sing at a Karaoke, visit a church you know nothing about, volunteer for a crisis center, join a club, study something completely foreign to you. Break out of your comfort zone and you might be surprised what gets waked up in you.

Be Creative: Each day set aside 2-3 minutes of quiet time to contemplate a project or idea you are working on – give yourself space and time to do this, if you get distracted write a note.

The idea here is to let your mind wander, we don’t see idle thinking as work yet most of us know our best ideas pop into our heads when we’re not thinking about anything in particular. So sit, be quiet and just wander, you will find wild, wacky and creative ideas that you can later develop or reject but which might just give you a whole new way to look at your world

Listen up: Listen to people that know you. You may not be that aware of the things you do best but people who know you do. Listen to people when they say, “have you ever thought of doing____?” or “You are really good at___.” Next time someone says something to you–don’t blow it off, follow up instead. Being open to other people’s experience of you can expand your ideas of yourself!

You knew as a child: Remember what you imagined or pretended when you were playing by yourself as a child, under the age of seven. This will key you into your soul’s purpose. Were you a teacher, did you build things, make clothes for your dolls, heal your pets? It is important to remember what you imagined when you were alone, and therefore un-influenced by other people, and under the age of seven when the “inner self” is more pronounced than the conscious mind and conscious ego.

Is it really hidden: Sometimes, I think our hidden talents aren’t really hidden – more like repressed or discounted and ignored. Be especially aware of what other people “see” in you that you may or may not validate or give much attention to yourself.

What’s easy for you: We all think that the things we are good at are easy, so we tend to discount their value. Conversely, we value things that we find difficult – which other people find easy. If something comes easily to you, chances are you’re good at it, too – and often the people for whom it’s not easy will pay you to do it.

Find Your sweet Spot: In order to find your sweet spot, or your unique gift, think of those things that come easy to you. To you it’s no big deal, but to others, it’s incredible. What are those things that others come to you for that for you, it’s as easy as breathing and you’d do it for fun whether you were paid or not? When your operating out of your sweet spot, your true talent will shine!

One thing with effortless ease: What did you ALWAYS dream about doing or becoming? What did you dream about doing when you were a kid? What kind of success in other people´s lives make you the most jealous or uncomfortable with your life when you see it? (even if it´s in a movie, song, book or real life)

Ignite the spark within: Our true entrepreneurial talents may be divined by the emotion sparked by engagement. Listen to your heartbeat, when it speeds our intent becomes fueled by passion which enables action. Action is the key to realizing our identified entrepreneurial talents. If the spark isn’t there, you won’t have the stamina to withstand the inevitable setbacks.

Smiley face: What do you do that makes you burst into a genuinely happy smile? Do that!

Don’t get mad, get paid: If you see something wrong, why don’t you right it’ the song goes. If something bugs you about the way things are, making a difference can make you money. Chances are if you’re annoyed by something, other people are too. All the better if you can do something profitable that helps everyone!

Mike Michalowicz

10 Risks Of Infidelity And How To Prevent It

Posted by: tosin on October 29, 2014

Research indicates that 30 – 60% of all married individuals will engage in infidelity; that nearly 50% of all marriages end in divorce; that long-term monogamy is difficult to achieve; and that 50 – 70% of men will cheat on their wives. Research also suggests that men are less likely to leave their wives when they are cheating, so they cheat and make every attempt to remain in the comfort of the covenant relationship. Media has capitalized on this data and made sure that all marketing efforts for men have some level of sexually seductive suggestions that lure men into the one thing that research shows they like the most, other women.

With those kinds of percentages, infidelity is more like a pandemic, than it is a sinus infection. For black men, who want to live their lives with integrity and be black and married with kids, it is, at best, scary to know that the possibility of cheating is so close to him. So, to help both men and women understand infidelity and figure out how they should address it in their relationship, I have chosen to do with infidelity what medicine has done with prostate cancer and hypertension; prevent it. In order to win this battle in your relationship, you must work proactively.

So, rather than writing about the signs of cheating or why men cheat; I wanted to take the research at face value and take responsibility for the risk I believe myself and all other men face, the risk of infidelity.

Here are a few things we know about cheating and what we can do to prevent it:

1. The younger the man is when he gets married the greater the possibility is that he will cheat

Young men should ensure that they are in healthy mentoring relationships with other men who can help them process through feelings and situations that could lead to them cheating. At some level, all men should have other faithful men in their life that can help them process through difficult times.

2. True signs of infidelity are often seen in retrospect

Signs of cheating normally show up as little inclinations with limited certainty. But are later made very clear, after the cheating has already occurred. Couples rarely talk about feelings of cheating because they don’t feel safe enough. I mean, most men would never say, “Baby, I’m feeling like having s*x with the secretary. Can you help me?” And most women could not handle a conversation like that anyway. But, more mature couples understand that life brings temptations and they attempt to talk about them and get through them together.

3. It is emotionally possible to have feelings for more than one person.

The reality of relationships is that it is very possible to have feelings for more than one person at the same time. It is difficult to manage a secretly intimate relationship with another person, but it is possible. Women should realize that it is possible for their husband to have feelings for another person and not think that just because he loves her “so much” that it could never happen. Couples have to be able to talk about this possibility and have an emergency plan to handle it if it does happen. Marriage is no fairy tale.

4. Attractiveness plays a major role in who men cheat with.

Men should take responsibility for knowing what kind of women are their “type”. They should avoid every situation where a woman of their “type” is involved. Don’t hire, don’t hang out with, don’t spend alone time with, don’t friend on Facebook, call… … guess you get the point. Acting like your wife is the only woman you could ever be attracted to is a sure set up.

5. Cheating is highly predicated on opportunity.

Cheating’s best friend is opportunity. Men who cheat spend a tremendous amount of time and effort planning their opportunities to cheat. If you have ever had a fleeting moment in your alone travel that made you feel like doing something wrong, then stop traveling alone. Monitor how you plan your schedule and make sure that you don’t plan opportunities for yourself to fall.

6. s*xual desire and satisfaction impact cheating.

Make sure that you’re not only having s*x, but you are having good and satisfying s*x with your partner. Match each other’s s*x drive and s*xual satisfaction level. Remember that self service will eventually decrease intimacy and lower s*xual intimacy with your partner, so use that energy with your partner. Talk about your s*xual experience; what could be better and what was right on point.

7. Men with Avoidant or Dismissive Attachment Styles are more likely to cheat.

Men who avoid confrontation and don’t like talking about problems are at a higher risk of cheating. These men are sometimes uncomfortable with intimacy and have a difficult time emotionally expressing themselves. Men need to force themselves to have intimate conversations with their wife and be vulnerable. At the same time, women need to help men feel like they can talk about “anything”.

8. Couples that are afraid to tell the truth and talk about their problems are at greater risk of infidelity.

Men who have a hard time talking about general problems, such as finances and family issues will have a more difficult time talking about their infidelity. Men who lie about little things will obviously lie about adultery. Men need to take risk to tell the truth about things they feel may make their wives upset. The better they get at telling the truth about little things, the more confident they will be at talking about and telling the truth about the big things.

9. Men who have had multiple s*x partners and or a family history of men who have cheated are at greater risk.

Men need to realize that there are some women and people in their lives that are due their forgiveness. Men should take responsibility for their past s*xual relationships and vow to s*xual purity with one woman. Even when the woman they love is not the woman they want to have s*x with; they should restrain themselves and make love to their wife “on purpose”.

10. The role of faith has an impact, but faith alone does not lower the probability of a man cheating.

Men need a greater reason than their relationship with God to keep them from cheating. Often Christian men minimize the possibility of them ever cheating, even in the face of so many Christian men that have already fallen victim to infidelity. Men need to make a decision to “die with integrity.” Cheating is not about heaven or hell. It is really only about your reputation on earth and your legacy to your family. Men have to have a natural reason not to cheat. “Dying with integrity” is one of a man’s best reasons to be faithful

Source: BMWK

Kwam 1 meets 2face, Ali Baba, Lagbaja, Olamide, Others In Concert

ARTICLE | OCTOBER 29, 2014  | BY AKINTAYO OPEOLUWANI

If you are a music lover, get ready for the time of your life. Mark your calendars for Friday, November 21, when Lagos, Nigeria gets set to host the biggest selection of Nigerian artistes as music legend, King Ayinde Marshall (K 1 The Ultimate) stages a star-studded multi-genre music concert, "K1 Live Unusual". 

The legendary musician who has been performing for 43 years will be performing his greatest hits and more live at the greatest Fuji-pop inspired concert ever held

Lovers of Nigerian music can expect to hear some of their favorite tracks like “Talazo system”, “Baby mi show colour re” “Omo Niger” and “Eyo” from the 58 year old maestro behind a couple of our country’s most celebrated hits.

As more artistes and sponsors are revealed, ‘K1 Live Unusual’ is set to be the first and biggest of its kind, hosted by the King of comedy himself, Alibaba, with comedy by Buchi. The event is expected to attract over 5,000 fans of Nigerian entertainment with performances by multi- award winner 2face Idibia, Lagbaja, Olamide, Sir Shina Peters, Sir Victor Olaiya, Omawumi, and celebrity disc jockey, DJ Jimmy Jatt live on the turntables.

KWAM1 has been the inspiration behind many new acts, collaborating with artistes like Olamide on his hit single ‘State of the nation’, and has just concluded a tour in London, South Africa, North America, Malaysia and Australia.

Headliners 2face Idibia and Olamide confirmed their participation in the big budget event, during a media day to BHM. 

'This concert is going to be unusual. I have been following KWAM 1's music and i must say that i'm really privileged to be performing with the Fuji king at the concert." 2Face said.  

"I am a huge fan of King Ayinde Marshall because like we all know, he is a living legend so it's great honour to be performing at this concert", olamide said. 

The concert will be followed by an exclusive after-party held at Nigeria’s most prestigious club, Quilox, and is fully supported by the Lagos State Government, Lagos State Signage & Advertisement Agency (LASAA) and media partners HipTV.

Omoni Oboli & Husband Celebrate 14 Years of marriage

ARTICLE | OCTOBER 28, 2014 - 10:51PM

By Judith Judith
 

Congratulations to Omoni Oboli and her husband as they celebrate their 14th wedding anniversary. This is good news to see Nollywood couples celebrating marriage anniversaries in the midst of lots of divorces amongst their colleagues. Their marage has produced 3 handsome boys. She took to her Instagram page to talk about it;

14 years don waka! We still dey carry go, nobody waka, no body go solo! 14 years of everything! Fun, laughter, love, companionship, headache, craziness lol! My boyfriend, my lover, my everything! There's no me without you @nnamdioboli The wind beneath my wings! I can soar because you let me! May God keep us going stronger as the years go by! Love you to infinity and beyond!

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