Sure, you'd like to make more money--you think. But the messages our society sends you, and maybe that you send yourself, might be driving you in the opposite direction. Here's how to change that outlook.
Would you like to be rich? No, seriously, stop and think about that question. If you watch the news, there are plenty of reasons you might not want to be. These concerns may be working in your unconscious mind making sure that you never build wealth--which it sees as a terrible mistake.
The problem with this is that for your company and its employees, your family's future well-being, and your own eventual retirement, building wealth is not only desirable but necessary. And if you're unconsciously letting mixed feelings about what it would mean to be rich get in your way, you could be making life worse for yourself and them.
The time to change your attitude is now, and the first step to changing it is taking a closer look at some of the negative assumptions you may have about wealth, without really thinking about them. Ask yourself if any of these beliefs feel familiar:
1. Rich people are ridiculous and mean.
All you need to do is read the daily news to have developed this belief. Last week, the apparent evils of wealth took a turn for the spectacular with the arrest in Mexico and extradition to Texas of "affluenza mom" Tonya Couch. Her 16-year-old son Ethan was arrested in 2013 after a truck he was driving under the influence of marijuana, Valium, and three times the legal amount of alcohol killed four people. His lawyers argued that his overprivileged upbringing had brought on a form of mental illness--"affluenza"--and he received 10 years' probation, a sentence many considered way too light.
Now accused of violating that probation, Ethan and his mother fled to Puerto Vallarta, where they were arrested. Ethan is still fighting deportation and Tonya has some bitter complaints about jail conditions back in Texas.
While there are plenty of outrageously badly behaving rich people out there, there are also plenty who obey the law and drink in moderation. And there are plenty of tragic accidents caused by drunken teenagers in every socioeconomic group. Rich or not, you get to choose how you behave.
2. Rich people are selfish.
This, unfortunately, appears to have some validity. In a fascinating experiment, social psychologist Paul Piff found that people given unfairly large amounts of play money in a Monopoly game became more aggressive, meaner, more selfish, and more uncaring about their losing opponents. They even justified to themselves why they'd won the game even knowing perfectly well they'd been given an unfair advantage from the start.
But it doesn't have to be that way. Piff also found that even watching a 46-second video about poverty changed the selfish thinking of wealthy people. If you stay connected to the world, keep your eyes open, and keep caring about others people, money won't make you greedy and unfeeling.
3. Money is only good for buying more useless stuff.
If all you do with your wealth is fill up your house with the latest and niftiest gadgets, that money will indeed be useless. But it doesn't have to be that way. In fact, anotherfascinating experiment showed that money actually can buy happiness--if you spend it on someone else. It works on a bigger scale too, which is why Bill Gates, the richest man in the world, now focuses most of his attention on using his money to help the people who need it most.
4. I'm only supposed to have so much money.
You may be familiar with the setpoint theory of weight loss, which holds that the body tends to return to a specific weight to which it has grown accustomed, and that it's very difficult to break that pattern.
The same can hold true for our incomes. It's happened to me. I started out making relatively little money. And even though my clients and projects were constantly changing, I made about the same amount every year for many years. Then a few years ago, I picked up a new client who wanted me to do quite a lot of work and paid decently for that work, so that my income almost doubled. After a couple of years, the relationship ended, but something interesting happened. After an initial dip while I made up for losing that client, I continued making what I'd been making. That higher amount had become the new normal.
I'm not the only one. Tony Robbins told Inc. editor-in-chief Eric Schurenberg that he went along for seven or eight years earning a million dollars a year and no more because "if you want more than that, you're a total jerk." Admittedly, that's a pretty nice setpoint, but he broke through by asking himself why not be smarter, do more, and earn more, if he could.
If you or your company have been stuck at the same income for a few years, you may have a setpoint of your own. And it may be time to ask yourself--why not make more?
5. The only people who make lots of money are those who care about nothing else.
That's another myth that's obviously untrue if you're paying attention. Yes, the world is full of people who seem to care only for making money and some of them are very rich indeed. But then there are people like Steve Jobs, for whom money was inconsequential compared to his desire to build beautifully-designed technology and leave his mark on the world. A lot of entrepreneurs are hoping for that big acquisition payout, but just as many are in it because they want to build something lasting and wonderful. Which are you?
6. Money will change me.
If you like yourself the way you are and you believe that wealth will change you, it makes perfect sense if you didn't want to be rich. Why would you want to become someone else?
But there's no reason to fear that money will change you if you don't want it to. Yes, things like winning the lottery or inheriting a large sum do often change people, but that is unexpected, unearned, sudden wealth. Build wealth gradually in a way you understand by working hard and/or investing wisely you'll stay your old self.
So go ahead, make 2016 the year you become truly financially successful. It won't make you a bad person but it will help you provide for your family, your employees, and your own future. And maybe some people who truly need help as well.
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